I've been toying around with the idea of a prompt about a girl, probably my age, who's in this totally unfulfilling relationship with a guy. He's a little older than she (I'm 17 and the guy I'm basing this off off is 20) and it's mostly a physical relationship. She has few feelings for this guy. He's the only one who pays her any attention, and she was flirting with him because she likes being paid attention to, and likes the feeling of victory she gets whenever flirting progresses into something more, but there was nothing more than that, and she has no idea how to extricate herself from the relationship without there being some seriously weird consequences afterwards (they work together, so it would be very strange if they saw each other later. And all the magazines warned against workplace romances).
"Hey, you wanna come over this weekend?" he asked, looking at her hopefully. Her eyes glazed a little, and she processed the pros and cons of another weekend together. She wasn't sure how she had let the relationship go this far. She was just not interested in him, but she couldn't start refusing him without it being suspicious. Another dull Saturday would end up with him playing video games while she sat next to him, trying not to fall asleep. He'd want to sleep together and she'd comply because she was bored and wow, what a shitty forecast for the weekend.
She smiled, "yeah, sure, I'd love to come over," she said, the words slipping easily out of her mouth. He smiled back at her, then she grabbed his belt loop and pulled him in for a kiss. She claimed his mouth; he was very passive when it came to physical interaction and allowed her to take charge. He said she was passionate. She was just pissed.The guy who I'm basing my male character off of smokes, and I wanted that to effect her too. I think she'll pick up the habit without even thinking about it. A very obvious symbol of how the relationship is impacting her.
"But that's not even funny," he said, after a pause.
She took a drag off her cigarette. Her eyes were dead as she said, "it's funny because I hate everyone."
He smiled and nodded like he understood. She knew he didn't, and his feigned interest made her more upset. If he really didn't want to listen to her, he could just tell her to be quiet. Or change the subject. Or bring something to the table himself, just once. But she knew he wouldn't. Because he was the most spineless individual she'd ever met, and being around him made her physically ill, but she still couldn't bring herself to leave him. She could find a way to look him in the eyes and say that she was through with him and all of his emotional bullshit, just like she'd done many times in the mirror.
She'd rehearsed and rewritten her breakup speech many times. Sometimes she'd said it quietly, whispering as though he might start to cry, reassuring him it wasn't his fault. Sometimes she'd screamed it, loud enough to make her own ears ring, pouring forth her irritation and disappointment in herself and him, making sure he knew just how much she loathed him. One draft contained many curse words, another none. Occasionally she cried, most times she hoped he did. One draft was very gentle, another was venomous. She spent more time thinking about how to break up with him than anything else, and it was making her irritable. She snapped at people at work, hung up on people when she didn't feel like talking. The relationships she felt she could control were taking a beating because she was coddling the one she hated the most. People began to pull away from her, and this made her even more angry and depressed. Her terrible boyfriend indirectly cost her a best friend and the peace with her parents.
No comments:
Post a Comment